Pressure tactic 12 of 12
Isolation and secrecy: why "don't tell anyone" is a red flag
Telling you not to check with anyone else.
How it sounds
Don't tell the bank. They're part of the investigation.
Keep this between us.
This offer is only for you, so don't share it.
What it is
Attempts to stop you getting a second opinion, because a second opinion would end the deal.
Why it works: Decisions made alone and under pressure are easier to steer.
How to spot it
- You're told to keep it secret.
- You're discouraged from talking to family, your bank or an adviser.
- They insist you stay on the line.
Your counter-move
- Treat any request for secrecy as a signal to stop.
- Hang up, and talk to someone you trust.
- A legitimate organisation will never ask you to hide something from your bank.
Say this
“I don't make decisions I can't talk about. I'll get back to you.”
Where you'll see it: Romance and investment scams, fake officials and high-pressure sales.
Think you're facing isolation and secrecy?
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Questions
What is isolation and secrecy?
Telling you not to check with anyone else. Attempts to stop you getting a second opinion, because a second opinion would end the deal.
How can I tell if it's isolation and secrecy?
You're told to keep it secret. You're discouraged from talking to family, your bank or an adviser. They insist you stay on the line.
What should I say when someone uses isolation and secrecy?
Try: "I don't make decisions I can't talk about. I'll get back to you." Then: Treat any request for secrecy as a signal to stop. Hang up, and talk to someone you trust. A legitimate organisation will never ask you to hide something from your bank.
Browse all twelve in the pressure tactics library, read the Black Friday field guide to see them in action, or practise spotting them in Spot the tactic, one made-up message a day.